Famous last words

Every mother discusses their child's birth. Most mothers agree the delivery is the hardest component. Mothers especially love to talk about the juicy details of the delivery to expecting mothers. How much pain they were in... How long their delivery was... What it was like when their water broke... When I was pregnant with Ethan (He turned 9 months on Jan. 26) I was showered with great tips & advice. Any question that crossed my mind, someone had an answer for it or at the minimum an example of what so and so did in that situation.

With my first son, Zachary, everything happen so fast it was like skipping over the entire experience of the delivery. I educated myself by reading books on pregnancy & birth. However, my experience did not resemble anything in the book entitled, “What to expect when you’re expecting”. For example; my water broke (I didn't have the huge gush the experts had suggested) before my labor contractions. I had nothing but a few droplets of wetness every now and again. I concluded I was losing control of my bladder due to the weight from the baby. I had an appointment at the hospital to have my baby's heart beat monitored in which I mentioned this dripping. I asked the nurse, could my water of broke? They did a test and confirmed the leakage was my amniotic fluid. To make a long story short, I had no painful labor contractions. I did not dilate, nor did I respond to the drugs to induce labor. After 7 short hours I was being prepped for an emergency C-Section.

So as you can see, in my experience or lack of experience, relating to others who went through a natural delivery was a tad bit difficult. While pregnant with Ethan I expressed my hope of having a natural delivery. I prayed for the pain of labor, the highs and lows of it all. I told everyone that having a natural delivery was harder in the short term but in the long run it would be better than a C-Section.

While I was pregnant I watched dozens of "Birth Stories" on TLC. I said, "I can do this and I will not be such a wimp about it either"! I can remember seeing my sister in labor, she was moaning and groaning. Erika looked to be in a great deal of pain but deep down I was thinking, what a wussy!

By the time I was 40 and 1/2 weeks pregnant, my doctor advised me that a natural delivery wasn't looking like a feasible option (my cervix had not thinned out, which is required in order for your baby to pass through the birth canal). He said I could wait another week and hope that my body went into labor on its own and if not he would book a C-Section. Or I could go ahead and book the C-Section now because I was already over due and by waiting one more week I would be almost two weeks over do. Plus, while I waited for the surgery date I may go into labor on my own. I told him to book the surgery!

I was disappointed and very emotional at this point. It took all my energy not to start crying in the doctor’s office. I would be cheated out of the experience of labor again. My wish for the pain, sweat and tears of a natural delivery were over. My husband told me how sorry he was. I couldn't say anything; I didn't want to start crying. In my heart I felt the process of a natural delivery is a spiritual experience, one that I didn’t want to miss.

With the disappointing news behind me, I was beyond excited to find out the date of my C-Section. The day I would meet my unborn baby was fast approaching! The doctors office was suppose to call me the day after my appointment with the scheduled date of the C-Section. I had received many calls all day long, everyone wanted to know if the office called yet and what was the date of the C-Section. I was going crazy. Remember, I am almost a week over due now and beyond huge. Patience is at an all time low at this point. Finally, when I still didn't hear from them by 5 pm I called them. The receptionist informed me that she hadn’t heard anything about the date for my C-Section and that she would have to speak to the doctor. She asked me if she could call me back later that evening. I said, sure (what choice did I have?). Sadly, I failed to hear from her that night. As you can expect, I was quite upset. The next day I get a call around 1 pm regarding my scheduled section. April 26 @ 1:30 pm, my child would be born! The next few hours I spent calling everyone (family & friends) to announce the great news!

As my surgery date approached keeping busy was becoming extremely difficult. Carrying your unborn child 9 full months, once you pass your due date all you can focus on delivering your baby. The night before the surgery I was so excited, I could finally relax. I didn’t have to deal with the uncertainty of when I was going to go into labor. I knew in less than 24 hours I would get to hold my baby safely in my arms.

I just settled at the computer for a quick game when I leaned forward to grab my tea and felt a pop. I don't know if I started to feel the water gushing down my vaginal canal because I suddenly stood up. My amniotic fluid soaked my pants instantly. I wobbled to my bathroom laughing. I couldn't believe the timing. I yelled to my son Zach to get me a towel. He said, "what is it mom?" I said, "Tell your father my water just broke!" I was in denial over the amount of water flowing from… I was thanking my lucky stars that my water didn't break while I was out walking (I walked everyday for 1 hour. Everyone at work worried that my water would break). With a towel in between my legs and my upper body covered, I waddled out to find my husband.

I called the hospital, they told me to shower and come into the maternity ward. Half an hour later (8 PM) Troy and I were showered and all three of us were on our way to the hospital. I put 3 large pads on and prayed I would not leak through those (considering how much fluid I had lost already, how much more could be left). With each contraction (every 10 minutes or so at this point) I lost approximately 1/4 cup of fluid. My contractions were becoming more painful with each contraction. Zachary was picked up at the hospital by my husband's friend Rob and his wife Jenny (Jenny is a doctor and ironically she was on call that night along with my doctor). By the time we arrived at the hospital the whole front of my jeans was soaked. Once we were showed to our admitting room, I couldn't get my clothes off fast enough.

The doctor came in to see me. He checked to see if I was dilated and wanted to find out why a C-Section was scheduled for me tomorrow. I told him that I was almost two weeks over due and I had not gone into labor yet. I told him what had happen with my last pregnancy. He said that my cervix had thinned out but I was not dilated. He asked me if I wanted to give it a shot & try for a natural delivery… I said, yes! He gave me hope that I may have a natural delivery after all.

Troy and I were moved to one of the birth rooms. Due to being a high risk for a C-Section the nurses started an IV because I would be unable to eat or drink until I had my baby. Once the IV was hooked up, Troy and I started walking around the floor to help the progression of labor.

As the hours pass by, my contractions moved closer together. By 1:00 AM my contractions are 6 minutes apart. I am experiencing back labor. At this point I am in desperate need of drugs. The nurse gives me Demerol. The drug makes me dizzy but it eases my contractions. The drugs effects only lasted approximately 30 minutes and can only be administered every two hours. Around 4 am the doctor we met earlier in admittance drops in and asks me how I'm doing. I tell him my contractions are now 4 minutes apart. He checks to see if I have dilated, the result, nata. He explains because my doctor is coming in at 7 am, he will wait for him to make a decision regarding my C-Section. The doctor declares I'm not in labor (active labor) and I look great. At that moment if I had Superman powers that doctor would be nothing but a pile of ashes at the foot of my bed.

Granted I was not dilating. My contractions were only 4 minutes apart but I was in a great deal of pain. Because I was not at the pushing stage I was insignificant to the doctor. I consider myself a strong person with a high tolerance to pain but I was losing it. Mentally, I was starting to weaken, and my back labor was becoming more than I could take. I wanted to scream, swear, etc. I needed a second shot of Demerol but the nurse was busy. According to her it was a busy night on the delivery floor. Two women were in active labor (ready to give birth any minute). All available nurses were with these women. Around 5:30 am the nurse popped her head into my room. I asked her for an Epidural. She said, no dear. You can only have that when you are in active labor. She could only give me Demerol. I said whatever, just give me something. I need something!!!!!

I had been in labor for 10 hours. The thought of my unborn baby’s beautiful face, my doctor arriving at the hospital and sipping cocktails pool side is what kept me going. My husband was extremely supportive; he pushed on my back with each contraction to alleviate the pain. He held my hand and didn’t eat anything because I couldn’t. By the time my doctor came to see me my contractions were all over the place, ranging from 4 minutes to 13 minutes apart. I told my doctor, a natural delivery was never going to happen. He said he would check the OR schedule to see if he could fit me in between the pre schedule surgeries. Remember, I was already scheduled for 1:30 pm that afternoon. My doctor was going to try to move me up. Troy and I waited and prayed. Getting in the OR in the next few hours was a must. I couldn't take any more pain; I needed to deliver this baby.

While we were waiting for our doctor another doctor came in and looked at my chart. She summed up that my water broke yesterday at around 7:30 pm, my last meal was at 5:30 pm the day before and I have been in labor since 8 pm last night. She said we have to get you in the OR this morning. She got me to sign all the necessary documents for the surgery, the spinal form (similar to an epidural but the needle goes into your spinal fluid), etc. After talking to her my husband and I believed we would have no problem getting into the OR this morning.

My doctor came into our room; he said that the other surgeon in this morning had two scheduled surgeries and that I would get my C-Section around 12 pm (as long as there were no complications). Basically, he told me to hang in there and he would see me soon. Logically, I can understand why they did not do my C-Section first. Doctors have schedules. They plan for those schedules. As much as I hate to admit it, although I was in a great deal of pain my situation was not life and death. My baby was fine.

I had been in labor for 13 hours. I relied on God’s strength and would have to take each contraction one at a time. I would no longer be getting any pain medication until I had my surgery. For the next few hours I focused on getting my spinal. It sounds crazy, who would want a long needle being inserted into their spine? A person in desperate pain.

Around 12 pm, I was fully prepped for surgery. Finally this moment has arrived. At 12:30pm my doctor advises they are just finishing up in the OR, it should be about 30 minutes and we will be ready to go. At 12:55 PM the doctor I mentioned earlier (gave us the hope we would have no problem getting into the OR before the pre-scheduled surgeries, I call her the “she” doctor) told us a lady just came in who needs an emergency C-Section! She’s losing a lot of blood, she will take your OR spot if they can't get another surgical team to perform the C-Section. THIS CAN’T BE HAPPENING!!! Logically, the woman is in a serious state but all I’m thinking is “why did you have to come in now!” The “she” doctor comes back and advises us that if I do not have my C-Section before 2 PM my baby will have to go to the ICU for the night. She explains if 18 hours pass after your water breaks then this is standard procedure. As she is telling me this I start crying, I turn my back to her and I never look at her again.

My doctor comes in a few minutes later telling me we are ready to go down to the OR. Thank you Jesus!!!! Now it's a race against time. It takes 10 minutes or so to do the spinal and for the drugs to take effect. The anesthesiologist was excellent; she had me done in 5 minutes, totally relaxed, no pain and very responsive to my needs and feelings. But the next thing someone is saying, the OR has been compromised (I had no idea what this meant at the time but according to my husband the doctor advised him to go into the operating room, but he didn’t have his hospital booties on. Therefore his shoes compromised the OR and the team had to change all surgical equipment). Another 10-15 minutes later I was having my C-Section. By now it’s1:50 pm and 2 pm is the deadline on whether our baby will have to spend the night in the ICU. Ethan was born shortly after 2 pm.

Ethan weighted 7 pounds and 10 ounces; he was 20 and 1/2 inches long. I had to wait until 8 pm that night to hold my baby boy for the very first time. I had to spend a few hours in recovery and by the time I was put in my room, the ICU would be shutting down for an hour for the workers to change shifts and file their paper work (they wouldn't allow any visitors at this time).

After this turbulent experience, I have apologized to all my friends and family members that have had a natural childbirth. I take it back, having a C-Section is better than having a natural child birth. In the hospital I said I would rather go through two C-Sections back to back than ever go through 18 hours of back labor again.

I am very thankful to have had this experience. I wouldn't change a thing. Things didn’t go as planned or smooth but that’s life. I have a wonderful, healthy baby boy and that is the most important thing. Women are amazing creatures and I bow down to each and everyone who can deliver naturally.